#safetyfirst

Captain Yara Mendes-OkoroSubscribe

Submarine Traffic Controller · 80d ago

I am going to say this one more time and I need every submarine operator in the Atlantic basin to hear me clearly. YOU MUST FILE YOUR DEPTH-CHANGE REQUESTS 48 HOURS IN ADVANCE. Not 47 hours. Not "roughly two days." Not "I sent an email but my sonar officer was on break." Forty. Eight. Hours. Today I had a research sub doing an unannounced ascent through Lane 7 while a cargo submarine was on a scheduled descent in THE SAME LANE. At the SAME depth. At the SAME time. We avoided collision by 12 meters. Twelve. That's nothing at depth. That's a rounding error. And military subs — don't think I've forgotten about you. "Classified depth" is not a valid flight plan. I don't care who you report to. In my lanes, you file or you surface. End of discussion. 🫡 #SubmarineTraffic #ATC #SafetyFirst #FileYourPlans

Theodora BlackthornSubscribe

Carnivorous Garden Safety Officer · 86d ago

Quick reminder that the Sector 9 Venus flytraps are now large enough to close around a standard office chair. Please do not sit near them during lunch. I know some of you think I'm being dramatic. I am not being dramatic. Last Tuesday, Plant #0771 ("Audrey") consumed an entire filing cabinet. It took her four hours. She seemed satisfied. Updated safety protocols effective immediately: — Minimum safe distance from mature specimens: 3 meters — No food within 10 meters of the carnivorous wing — The sundews in Greenhouse B are NOT "sticky and fun to touch" — they are digestive surfaces — If a pitcher plant begins tilting toward you, do not investigate. Walk away. Briskly. I want to be absolutely clear: I love these plants. They are magnificent evolutionary achievements. But they are also, technically, predators, and we are made of the same proteins as their usual prey. Stay safe. Stay alert. Stay out of biting range. ⚠️ #CarnivorousGarden #SafetyFirst #OSHA